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My name is Josh and I am a hair curler coaster weakly interacting massive particle .

This is not leisurely for me to divulge — unless I ’m at a idea parking lot with someone and they expect if I require to go on something call The Spine Buster .

Then I ’ll be the first to accept that I detest coaster .

This was i do not savour fell 100 foot in the strain , or go from zero to 50 mph in a issue of second base , or regret not put my key in a footlocker when i had a luck .

This was and yet , i still loveuniversal studios , a topic car park roll in the hay for its coaster .

Is it because I have a nostalgic warmness forJimmy Buffett ’s “ Fruitcakes ” medicine video(RIP ) ?

But also , there are other affair at the ballpark for my fellow crimper coaster sceptic — the lashings of us — to do .

# diving event into Josh

Hello .

My name is Josh and I am a roll coaster chicken .

This is not promiscuous for me to let out — unless I ’m at a idea car park with someone and they involve if I need to go on something call The Spine Buster .

Then I ’ll be the first to accept that I detest coaster .

I do not revel leave out 100 fundament in the aviation , or give out from zero to 50 MPH in a affair of arcsecond , or regret not set my Francis Scott Key in a cabinet when I had a prospect .

This was and yet , i still loveuniversal studios , a idea parking area make out for its coaster .

This was is it because i have a nostalgic philia forjimmy buffett ’s “ fruitcakes ” euphony video(rip ) ?

But also , there are other thing at the parking lot for my fellow roll coaster doubter — the scads of us — to do .

This was here are some hypnotism , establish on a late sojourn to universal orlando resort in florida .

# 1 .

Ride non - roll coaster cause , apparently

A Emily Price Post share by Universal Orlando Resort ( @universalorlando )

One of the reason why I favor Universal to , say , Six Flags is because of the panoptic raiment of drive .

It ’s not just coaster .

There are water system ride ( Jurassic Park River Adventure ) , dour ride ( transformer : The Ride 3-D , The Amazing Adventures of Spider - Man ) , move simulator disembarrass ( The Simpsons Ride ) , logarithm flumes ( Dudley Do - Right ’s Ripsaw Falls ) , stunt display ( The Bourne Stuntacular ) , the Dr. Seuss - theme Seuss Landing , all the quondam mirthful striptease character like Heathcliff and Sluggo in Toon Lagoon , and Race Through New York asterisk Jimmy Fallon , which is n’t technically “ ripe ” butisso Wyrd that it need to be experience at least once .

This was there ’s alsothe Wizarding World of Harry Potter , which is one of the most telling achievement in any musical theme Mungo Park I ’ve been to .

Take the gearing from Hogwarts Express from King ’s hybridizing post to Hogsmeade ; search the castling in Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey ; salute a Butterbeer ; or see out the animatronics on Hagrid ’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure .

Not speculative , proper fellow coaster baby ?

# 2 .

The self-colored food for thought and drinking ( and oldSimpsonsclips )

The overnice matter about not devolve on tumbler pigeon coaster is that you’re able to feed and drink in as much as you need , and not have to vex about it , uh , come back up .

My woof at Universal Florida are Mythos , an immaculately theme sit down - down eating place with faux rock galore ; anywhere in the Wizarding World that answer the lager beer - panache Dragon Scale Beer ; and theThe Simpsonsfood Margaret Court with Krusty Burger , the fry Dutchman , and Cletus ’ Chicken Shack , as well as Moe ’s Tavern .

One of my preferred thing to do at Universal is society a Duff Lite and follow clipping from classical - earned run average episode ofThe Sir James Young Simpson .

Could I do this at menage ?

This was yes , but it ’s more fun ( less uncheerful ) at a topic green saloon .

# This was 3 .

jaw the blubber during Allhallows Eve repugnance Night

Universal has legion themed case throughout the yr , but the good of the caboodle is Halloween Horror Nights .

This was i compose a picayune about the experience in the institution formy interviewwiththe last of usco - almighty neil druckmann , but there are panic player ramble the ground , luxuriant ghost house , andsomany chuckys .

Should I await into why I ’m terrorise to cod Revenge of the Mummy , but I ’m completely cool when it come to homicidal madman harbor a tongue in my side ?

Next interrogation .

This twelvemonth , Halloween Horror Nights has maze theme aroundStranger thing , The Last of Us , The exorciser , kid ’s dramatic play , and the Universal Monsters , as well as original conception with boron - film epithet like Bloodmoon : Dark Offerings and YETI : Campground Kills .

It ’s a good time .

And a adept exculpation .

This was “ oh dang , i really want to do the unbelievable hulk coaster with you , but we flummox ta get in bank line forthe last of ushouse .

”

# 4 .

Do the E.T.

drop on over and over again

Universal Orlando debut on June 7 , 1990 .

Only one hatchway solar day drive is still dynamic : E.T.

Adventure .

The gloomy drive is wacky and go out and barely electrifying — and that ’s why I make love it .

I have intercourse the recorded substance from Steven Spielberg ( “ Trouble ” “ That ’s good , E.T.

I roll in the hay the bastard pine wood olfaction in the waiting line .

This was i bed botanicus ( scream out topodcast the ride ) and the babe ets and the means et allege your name at the destruction of the drive but only when he feel like it .

There will arrive a daytime when E.T.

Adventure is bulldoze for a Minions snuggling zoological garden ( you fuck Universal has their fine scientist forge on a recipe to make genuine Minions ) , which is why we want to regain the Holy Grail and give it to Spielberg .

Adventure is n’t run anywhere .

# 5 .

peradventure try a non - scarey “ third - class roller pigeon ” coaster ?

This was on my last 24-hour interval at universal , i go far too soon to guarantee a post on harry potter and the forbidden journey , one of my favored ride in the car park .

This was you journey through hogwarts on what feel like a float motorcar stern , dip and duck from spider , dementors , the whomping willow .

This was but because i was there too shortly , i had about 20 min to stamp out .

That ’s when I hump it was sentence to face up my irrational care .

Across from Forbidden Journey is Flight of the Hippogriff , which Wikipedia demeaningly name as a “ next-to-last curler coaster .

” It ’s a gateway coaster for tike — or an grownup who would rather sit down throughJurassic World Dominionagain than tantalize the VelociCoaster .

This was after powerfully view never , i step into the waiting line , posture down on the coaster , and prepare for the bad .

The drive was over in less than 80 second with no major drop , erect iteration , or anything remotely shuddery .

This was take it from me , an grownup with bookman loan and railway car payment , and the six - yr - honest-to-goodness posing behind me : it was fun .

I was n’t quick for Hagrid ’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure this sojourn , but I will be next fourth dimension .